5 Ingredients For Having Confidence
Published August 05, 2024 · 10:21 · 82,709 views
About This Video
Five ingredients for confidence, each illustrated by a single day at a water park. Desire: Van loses his six-year-old son in the Lazy River, and every desire focuses onto one thing. Find that boy. Resolve: a stranger performs the Heimlich maneuver on a choking man, saving his life through sheer commitment. Foolishness: the boy jumped off a waterfall seven times after a grown woman turned back in fear.
Practice: Van broke his wrist learning a hockey stop at 29, then mastered it in Toronto two years later. But only in one direction. Punk rock arrogance: just enough to say to the world, I'm getting this done. Five ingredients. One water park. One afternoon.
Transcript
this episode is about building confidence and thank you betterhelp for sponsoring this episode we build confidence bit by bit as we gain competence for given tasks but it's important that we have a healthy mind to take us through our Ambitions I credit my years of therapy with keeping me focused and brave in the face of difficult decisions and I found better help to be the most immediate and accessible therapy platform better help is online therapy that eliminates the time consuming pain in the neck search for a therapist with better help you don't need a referral the better help signup process simply asks you questions straightforward questions that you answer online within 24 to 48 hours in most cases better help connects you to a licensed therapist appropriate for your needs better help is a very simple comfortable and convenient place for therapy you can do your sessions through text voice or video change your therapist if you want use this link for 10% off your first month of therapy and the link is in the description thank you better help my six-year-old boy got lost in the water park and I was the one who lost him lost X lost X in The Lazy River and now we're looking for him this happens confidence ingredient one desire shyness is nice and shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life that you'd like to confidence is the belief that you can accomplish the task at hand fear is a feeling that begins in the body usually in the stomach and migrates to infest the head confidence begins in the head and eventually inoculates the body from fear and desire is the bridge between the two when I couldn't find my son in the water park where is he all of my desires focused onto one thing find that boy all right this is the front entrance where they said they'd bring him but I don't see him this is the worst feeling I was confident that I could find him but was he confident that he could find me at this Exodus everyone's getting out confidence ingredient two resolve AKA die trying if you give up you're going to be less confident but if you stick it out you will build your confidence well during my search for the boy at about the point where I was the most nervous the entire Lazy River went silent and everyone started staring across the river from where I was standing and and there was a man in one of the Cabanas choking to death and another man Heimlich maneuvering him over and over and over and over and over again and these guys were huge 250 300 lb big big guys way too big for the little teenage lifeguards to get their arms around and this guy just kept Heimlich maneuvering who knows if the guy had ever done the Heimlich maneuver before but he had the confidence and the resolve to save the guy resolve confidence and he saved him it occurred to me to shoot it but it would have been indecent ingredient three foolishness okay I have a confession to make the reason my boy was lost was because we had been playing hide-and-go-seek in a crowded water park we were playing hide-and-go-seek in The Lazy River and we both had the same idea to drop anchor I got out on this side and waited for him he got out on that side and waited for me he didn't Panic me neither but the reason I had confidence that my boy would have the confidence to Not freak out was because earlier in the day it's a little Cliff that you jump off and my little Brave boy is going to try it he had jumped off this waterfall into the pool all right so sit down right there when he says it's okay you just let it rip here he goes and swam against a significant current to get himself out of the pool good job we had seen a grown woman get to the edge of the waterfall and just get too scared turn around and come back but my son did it seven times foolish of me to play hide and go seek in a crowded water park but success meant that his confidence in his own independence would be bolstered attention are you underall okay now the fun part ingredient four practice you build confidence in aggregate with the little successes you get achieving your little individual goals in 2004 after maybe 19 years of ice skating on ponds I finally resolved to learn how to do a hockey stop which my brother Dean had already learned how to do and we were in Philadelphia at a rink like this but outside and I was practicing for the entire session two hours or whatever trying to do it trying to do it I couldn't do it I couldn't do it so at at the end of the session when they blew the whistle and everyone had to leave the ice Dean was like okay final exam go as fast as you can and just commit and I went as fast as I could and I committed and I fell and I broke my 29-year-old wrist two years later circumstances brought me to move to Toronto for six months where they have ice skating rinks in every neighborhood for free and so for a month I practiced and practiced and practiced until I learned how to do a hockey stop and now I have the confidence to do a hockey stop but only in One Direction only like goofy or in the left Direction and that's a hockey stop I'm I'm afraid I'll break bones if I try to do it in the other direction so I'll have to come back and take lessons to practice and build up my confidence I think you get the confidence to ask a girl out on a date with the confidence you gained from learning how to ice skate confidence ingredient five punk rock arrogance just a little bit just enough to say the world I'm getting this done my main man Morrissey was a son and heir to a shyness that was criminally vulgar and yet he performs in front of tens of thousands of people he's beloved by Israel beloved by me and by the people of Mexico which incidentally was in view from the water park where I lost my boy on this week's patreon only video in 2003 I lived in Berlin as part of Tom Sachs's Nutsy installation at the Deutsche Guggenheim and through friends I met a bunch of Americans who were living in Berlin at the time and I began filming these interviews on September 11th 2003