39 Things I've Earned the RIGHT to QUIT
Published July 01, 2024 · 7:43 · 148,096 views
About This Video
A catalog of refusals, each one earned. 11 flat tires changed with bare hands in the Mexican desert in 2011, one while he had severe diarrhea: no more. Cheap tools: no more. Communal bathrooms, flip-flops outside the beach, baseball hats outside baseball, sneakers outside the house. QR code menus. Tablet ordering at restaurants, including his beloved Taco Bell. Plant-based ramen. Making his own pizza. Skateboarding after 35: a dignity thing.
The list itself is the argument. Van walks the line between dignity and snobbery explicitly. He was raised in Connecticut, which he calls probably the most snobby place he's ever been, snobber than France. Each refusal implies a history of having done the thing long enough and hard enough to quit it with authority, not avoidance. The closing line lands because the 39 items have already built the case: day-to-day living in 2008 was way better than day-to-day living in 2024. He's not being nostalgic. He's being precise.
Transcript
the things that I used to do that I ain't never going to do no more maybe in 2011 we changed 11 flat
tires in the desert with our bare hands in Mexico including one where I had severe
diarrhea I don't change motorcycle tires with my hands no more
no more changing non-emergency rear tire bicycle Flats the rear wheel has a
chain and breake stuff and it makes it messy mess to take it off and put it back on this is a front tire I'm not too
crazy about these either I will not buy cheap tools again I will not buy the cheapest anything again unless it's
Superior like this baby monitor it's the cheapest one I won't buy something solely because it's cheap or on sale no
more shoe repairs with my own hands no more oil changes with my own hands disposing the oil kills the incentive is
how every morning starts and it's such a pain in the ass not going to own a trailer or tow a trailer ever again I've
towed five motorcycles across the country twice I've graduated I use these trailer hitch racks
instead no more communal bathroom living outside my family I did it twice both
times I ended up becoming the bathroom mayor and had to clean the toilet every time I wanted to use it clothing there's
a certain Pride that many Americans take and dressing like slobs it's spreading around the world it ends with me no
flipflops outside of the beach pool or showers no shorts outside of beach exercise or pool
no baseball hats outside of baseball the beach or home no more sneakers outside of home
exercise or Sports for the most part I've stopped doing these things out of a sense of
laziness or dignity but there is a fine line between dignity and
snobbery and while I try to be a worldly person who is connected to the every
man I was raised in Connecticut and Connecticut is probably the most snobby
place I've ever been snober than France which brings us to restaurants a French
word I will not go unless I'm trapped by other people to a restaurant that still
has a QR code only menu if you still have a QR code only menu menu you can go
yourself I will not go to restaurants that require you to use a tablet to order the food including my beloved Taco
Bell I'll only use drive-thru now no more hyped up dump Sushi joints that are
way too expensive this is like a hip thing in La Kim and Kanye go to your restaurant once get photographed and now
all of a sudden there's a huge line and you have the freshest fish I've fallen for this scam in La Hawaii in New York
it's no more plant-based Ramen it's disgusting last year I retired from making my own pizza it's not fun it's
more expensive than the Pizzeria and it doesn't taste as good as the pizzeria now if I'm with a group of people I will attempt to influence them not to do
these things but I'll go along if pushed appropriately these are things that I won't do on my own
recognizance leisure snowboarding in the east in America I am
too spoiled by snowboarding in the west of America I'm done skateboarding this is a dignity thing I'm too old it became
tacky for me after the age of 35 alcohol drugs cigarettes though I will smoke a
cigarette when a friend or loved one has died no more running marathons no more
cheap seats at Live Events best seats I've ever had and this is this first game ever I barely want to go
in the first place no more surfing unless it's absolutely perfect
circumstances no more strap in snowboard bindings I use step in snowboard
bindings now like all the other old guys these are the traveling conventions
that I have quit that I won't do no more unless it's an emergency and unless it's for somebody else I quit couch surfing
at age 41 in 2016 no more guesting at a non- guest
ready house I quit this after staying at some incredible houses with amazing guest accommodations at airports no more
long-term parking Beyond walking distance to the terminal no more La NYC commercial Redeye plane travel no more
solo airplane travel for fun in America I'll do it in Europe I'll do it
in other countries the American system of air travel is garbage it's as bad or worse as the New York City subway system
they do not care about you no more nondirect flights in America stranded
for 3 Days in Tampa two years ago or last year Keller calls those cabs danger cabs cuz those are the ones that kidnap
you you'll never see this face in Mexico City again maybe my first I'm never doing this again was City to city bus
travel longdistance bus travel in America I'll do point to point in the city and I'll do longdistance bus travel
in other countries but in America sorry no Southwest Airline flights ever no
more United Airlines flights you know why you need an app to get food even if you cash even if you have credit card
the food's right there on a cart you need to download an app or have downloaded it and order through the app
in fact I will no longer use any product or service that requires an app apps are
fing stupid day-to-day living in 2008 was way better than day-to-day living in 2024
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Products & Tools Mentioned
- Taco Bell mentions
- Southwest Airlines mentions
- United Airlines mentions
People Referenced
Keller Grayson